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A Bad Idea 71

“I don’t know who exactly wanted to steal you,” Shade said. “Whoever it was hired a middleman.”

“Don’t tell me it was One-Eyed Jack,” Anne said.

“One-Eyed Jack?” Cat purred, raising an eyebrow.

“It was One-Eyed Jack,” Shade said.

“Ugh,” Anne said. She looked around the room at everyone. Finally, she said. “His name is an innuendo for a penis, okay? You know it, I know it, everybody knows it. I’m sure there are some eighty year olds out there who know it. It’s not subtle, I feel weirded out about it, and we couldn’t have a conversation about the man without addressing the fact that, basically speaking, he calls himself penis.”

An awkward silence fell over the room, and Anne let out a bit of a fake-cough.

“You’re thinking about one-eyed monsters,” Shade said.

“I’m never thinking about–” Anne began.

Shade cut her off, “It’s not one-eyed jack. It’s one-eyed monster. That’s the one that means dick.”

The corners of Anne’s lips curled downward. She was immensely upset and anxious about this situation but tried playing it off as something that didn’t bother her.

“Huh,” she said. “Learn something new every day.”

The Golden Man spoke up, “I’m being chased by dick?”

Emma let out a laugh, looking up at the ceiling. “Space is beautiful.”

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